I heard yesterday that these quiet moments in life are gifts to appreciate and cherish. I am now trying to keep generating these little snippets of time to just relax and be. Enjoy your naps!
I love that—“gifts to appreciate and cherish.” It really does feel like that when I let the moment be what it is, instead of rushing to fill it. I’ve been surprised at how even the smallest pause can shift the whole tone of a day. Hope you’re finding those good little snippets too, Teresa. Maybe, instead of naps, I'll call them "rests." ☺️
Lovely images and a relaxing essay. Two things struck me. One is the importance of connection with the other species we live with, and their magical lives. The other is seeing rest as a companion of work. It’s not really “unplugging”, is it? As if we were malfunctioning toasters. Better to consider rest as zooming out (to take in one’s surroundings) or zooming in (deep breaths, feeling gratitude. maybe it’s form of prayer?)
Relaxing -- that's a nice change, isn't it? Thanks for reading, Stew, and for the questions you raise here. "Malfunctioning toasters” made me laugh! I love your reframing of rest as a kind of zooming, in either direction. Whatever we need to gain perspective and to remember we’re part of something larger than our usual to-do lists. When we allow it, we are in communion.
I wish regular sleep were still a thing with me. Since a bad fall some 16 years ago, I've had the most spotty and sporadic sleep. But the body and the mind (and the soul) need rest, repose, regeneration. So yes to naps --- a medical necessity for me, even though I often emerge from the nap groggier than before (impaired breathing: yes, sleep labs, yes, CPAP, all the stuff that's been tried hasn't worked). Centering rituals are important: my early morning poetry ritual, approx. 1 hour of reading, and at least 40 minutes of writing. Meditation. Praying with beads (for me, at least) loosens the heart and pries it away from much of the madness about our current life. And gathering with people for poetry or recovery or spiritual things. Please pardon this long answer! Thank you for the questions.
Please don’t apologize, Thomas. This was a gift to read. I’m sorry you've struggled with sleep for so long; it’s such a foundational thing, and yet many of us are walking around with fractured rest and still expected to function. I really admire the way you’ve cultivated practices that nourish you anyway, especially that early morning poetry ritual. I think returning to the page or to prayer beads, again and again, even when nothing else feels steady, is just what we need. Thank you for sharing this. I'll carry it along with me tomorrow.
A stunning butterfly and a beautiful skink. A lovely summer over that way. I’m retired these days and just try to mix my activities as much as I can through the day. Life is still incredibly busy. A good life. Hugs and best wishes. 🤗🤗❤️💕
It really is a lovely summer, if hot and now a little too dry. Still, filled with wonder, if I’m paying attention. I’m glad to hear retirement is treating you well, even if life hasn’t slowed down much! It’s funny how full the days still get, isn’t it? Wishing you lots of little joys in the mix. Hugs right back. 💚
Ah, yes. By good buddy, Epictetus. Leave it to a Stoic to cut right to the heart of it. That feels especially relevant when it comes to rest, doesn’t it? Learning to notice what’s actually within my power (and what isn’t) has been central to many recent discoveries for me. It's hard to stay in that head space, though! Stepping away for a few minutes helps. Thanks for this reminder, Barry.
I feel the heaviness and exhaustion and probably a lifetime of thinking that doing it right didn't include taking time to rest. Setting that timer and taking those few minutes in the day.... it can be a good thing if it's possible. I hope you continue to give yourself that grace when you need it (although difficult in an office setting) and without apology. I like the balance delineated here between rest and tend. Very nice.
The jar with the chrysalises is so beautiful. What a wonderful thing to watch, do, shepherd, and tend. This though: "They spend much longer becoming butterflies than they do being them." Wow. That's definitely something to contemplate.
A lifetime, yes. My mother was the poster child for staying busy. I learn how to undo parts of that training almost every day, especially when something feels impossible or indulgent. When it comes to self-care, office life is uniquely challenged.How do you manage it, Amy?
Butterflies are miracles, for sure, and an honor to shepherd (love that word). I didn't go into a lot of detail here, but what they undergo to emerge with wings is beyond comprehension for me.
While they definitely steal the show, I have to admit that all the other critters out there also have their own magic. I know you might not want them too close ☺️ but they remind me that there is always a becoming in process. 🐛✨ Thanks for your thoughtful reflections, Amy.
This from said roomie-sister-in-law: yes, I was self-disciplined about my studying, but I ask you now…WHYWHYWHY DID WE DO IT? Where did it get us? I think I would be more rested caring for chrysalis and watching butterflies emerge than I ever am drawing furniture and worrying over tariffs and the economic implications in our industry. I’m coming back to be your roomie again, and I am bringing my olive green Crocs with me!! (And yes I nap whenever I can! But guilt follows me when I do-haven’t figured out how to escape the awkward feeling and just be OK with resting.)(Miss you guys-but we will see you soon I hope! And I am bringing my hat!!)
Come be my roomie again whenever you wish. But, this time, we’re blowing off studying in exchange for butterfly-watching. I’m so glad you nap when you can, Carolyn, even if the guilt still sneaks in. Maybe we just need to start reframing it as “deep economic recovery strategy?" 😄
Can’t wait to see you soon! -- and I've got a couple hats of my own I might bring along.
How strange it is to move from full-time mothering and full-time career to retirement and find that I no longer have the energy or endurance to do more than 2 or 3 outings in a day or only several hours of yard work. I've gradually come to accept that self care, including catnaps are not self indulgent but rather necessary for functioning. I awaken renewed and often inspired for journaling or painting or a call to a beloved friend.
The black swallowtail : I love seeing such a butterfly that takes longer to become than live! I haven’t seen one in Michigan for several years. Much you’ve given to think about. Thank you
I’m a ‘ never napper ‘ , so when I feel overwhelmed and need to rejuvenate myself , I tend to go outside into nature , my garden , looking up at the sky and clouds , and on down to the ground for all of the life that is not US . I often need breaks from people , and nature has always been my favorite sanctuary
Thank you so much Elizabeth , for your ability to to put to words the things that I cannot express
P.S. love those old Crocs of yours ! What a life they’ve lived!
If I'd been able to wait just one more day (of course, I could not have known), I could have shared *this year's* pictures. One emerged Thursday and three more today. :) So good to see you here, as always.
I love to nap. I don't do it as often as I'd like. But when I'm fading, it's all I want. And I feel so much better afterwards. The swallowtail photo is so lovely. I may have to paint her.
Resting and staring into space, surely the best part of a good if busy day.
But it was the story of the butterflies that charmed me. They are so beautiful and to think the circle of life is so short for such exquisite creatures. Like the parti-coloured lizard - they all contribute to the most perfect natural escape. If we can just remain attentive enough. Sometimes I think our minds are like bees in a bottle or frogs in socks. We just need to settle...
I also love the way Barry comes back with the best responses. Every - single - time.
Barry is a miracle in his own right, and I'm smiling widely knowing you're getting to see that.
It's never occurred to me before now, but the skink and the black swallowtail are almost exactly the same colors - just arranged differently!
My new batch of "flutterbys" (a first to have so many at once) are bringing much joy. And Prue, your recent postcard!!! My goodness, it is a thing of beauty unto itself. Thank you.
Elizabeth, I could read a book of Barry-isms quite happily. So much gentle wisdom. And I also really must share an image of a stumpwork black swallowtail that a friend of mine embroidered. It’s so awesome!
I'm a seldom napper. And long ago I learned the importance of backing up, stopping, and taking a break. As for the "fatigue" you speak of -- everyone of my American friends (in America) speak of the political fatigue. They are consumed with politics. And I think -- what a drain on daily life that must be.
I think I'd put myself in the seldom napper category, too, Karen -- a step up from years of thinking I was a never napper. (Though I'm still not sure 20 minutes counts as a nap!)
Yes, I think most folks who are engaging with U.S. politics are drained as a result, and I'm 100% sure that's the point of it. But we are a determined bunch... 🔥
You're not alone in having a hard time seeing the point of ::all this:: -- but I can tell you with all sincerity that your energy is gold, and I feel it coming through your words. Hugs of appreciation and empathy, Kathleen.
Ahhhh, 'They spend much longer becoming butterflies than they do being them.' is so poignant. An important reminder not to get so caught up in trying to get to some ultimate version of yourself - just be here now. Your life is now.
I am a napper. A big time napper. I am perpetually exhausted. I can sleep for 9 hours and take a 2 hour nap that afternoon and be ready to curl up in bed shortly after. Rest is hard for me. Or at least doing so without shame is. I come from a place that values hard work above all else. Working 12 hour days manual labour was not unheard of, and no one ever complained, they just kept going.
So I try to have a 7pm cut off. at 7 every night the day is done and I put down all the work, all the never ending to-do lists, and the shoulda dones, and I rest. I do only what I want - which is usually drinking tea reading with a cat on my lap in those last hours before bed.
Evelyn, your nighttime ritual sounds like one of the healthiest I've come across. Well done. One of my kids feels perpetually sleep deprived, and like you could sleep for hours in the middle of a day. You're both getting along as best you can in a society that doesn't take kindly to relaxation. There's real achievement in that, and I'm sure it's taken years to quiet the shame enough to let it happen.
Thanks for sharing this wonderful snippet of you! I'm glad you're here.
I heard yesterday that these quiet moments in life are gifts to appreciate and cherish. I am now trying to keep generating these little snippets of time to just relax and be. Enjoy your naps!
I love that—“gifts to appreciate and cherish.” It really does feel like that when I let the moment be what it is, instead of rushing to fill it. I’ve been surprised at how even the smallest pause can shift the whole tone of a day. Hope you’re finding those good little snippets too, Teresa. Maybe, instead of naps, I'll call them "rests." ☺️
Rests is good. For me, the main thing was the idea to welcome these breaks. Key is to remember, of course.
Lovely images and a relaxing essay. Two things struck me. One is the importance of connection with the other species we live with, and their magical lives. The other is seeing rest as a companion of work. It’s not really “unplugging”, is it? As if we were malfunctioning toasters. Better to consider rest as zooming out (to take in one’s surroundings) or zooming in (deep breaths, feeling gratitude. maybe it’s form of prayer?)
Relaxing -- that's a nice change, isn't it? Thanks for reading, Stew, and for the questions you raise here. "Malfunctioning toasters” made me laugh! I love your reframing of rest as a kind of zooming, in either direction. Whatever we need to gain perspective and to remember we’re part of something larger than our usual to-do lists. When we allow it, we are in communion.
I wish regular sleep were still a thing with me. Since a bad fall some 16 years ago, I've had the most spotty and sporadic sleep. But the body and the mind (and the soul) need rest, repose, regeneration. So yes to naps --- a medical necessity for me, even though I often emerge from the nap groggier than before (impaired breathing: yes, sleep labs, yes, CPAP, all the stuff that's been tried hasn't worked). Centering rituals are important: my early morning poetry ritual, approx. 1 hour of reading, and at least 40 minutes of writing. Meditation. Praying with beads (for me, at least) loosens the heart and pries it away from much of the madness about our current life. And gathering with people for poetry or recovery or spiritual things. Please pardon this long answer! Thank you for the questions.
Please don’t apologize, Thomas. This was a gift to read. I’m sorry you've struggled with sleep for so long; it’s such a foundational thing, and yet many of us are walking around with fractured rest and still expected to function. I really admire the way you’ve cultivated practices that nourish you anyway, especially that early morning poetry ritual. I think returning to the page or to prayer beads, again and again, even when nothing else feels steady, is just what we need. Thank you for sharing this. I'll carry it along with me tomorrow.
A stunning butterfly and a beautiful skink. A lovely summer over that way. I’m retired these days and just try to mix my activities as much as I can through the day. Life is still incredibly busy. A good life. Hugs and best wishes. 🤗🤗❤️💕
It really is a lovely summer, if hot and now a little too dry. Still, filled with wonder, if I’m paying attention. I’m glad to hear retirement is treating you well, even if life hasn’t slowed down much! It’s funny how full the days still get, isn’t it? Wishing you lots of little joys in the mix. Hugs right back. 💚
Epictetus. “Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens."
Ah, yes. By good buddy, Epictetus. Leave it to a Stoic to cut right to the heart of it. That feels especially relevant when it comes to rest, doesn’t it? Learning to notice what’s actually within my power (and what isn’t) has been central to many recent discoveries for me. It's hard to stay in that head space, though! Stepping away for a few minutes helps. Thanks for this reminder, Barry.
I feel the heaviness and exhaustion and probably a lifetime of thinking that doing it right didn't include taking time to rest. Setting that timer and taking those few minutes in the day.... it can be a good thing if it's possible. I hope you continue to give yourself that grace when you need it (although difficult in an office setting) and without apology. I like the balance delineated here between rest and tend. Very nice.
The jar with the chrysalises is so beautiful. What a wonderful thing to watch, do, shepherd, and tend. This though: "They spend much longer becoming butterflies than they do being them." Wow. That's definitely something to contemplate.
A lifetime, yes. My mother was the poster child for staying busy. I learn how to undo parts of that training almost every day, especially when something feels impossible or indulgent. When it comes to self-care, office life is uniquely challenged.How do you manage it, Amy?
Butterflies are miracles, for sure, and an honor to shepherd (love that word). I didn't go into a lot of detail here, but what they undergo to emerge with wings is beyond comprehension for me.
While they definitely steal the show, I have to admit that all the other critters out there also have their own magic. I know you might not want them too close ☺️ but they remind me that there is always a becoming in process. 🐛✨ Thanks for your thoughtful reflections, Amy.
This from said roomie-sister-in-law: yes, I was self-disciplined about my studying, but I ask you now…WHYWHYWHY DID WE DO IT? Where did it get us? I think I would be more rested caring for chrysalis and watching butterflies emerge than I ever am drawing furniture and worrying over tariffs and the economic implications in our industry. I’m coming back to be your roomie again, and I am bringing my olive green Crocs with me!! (And yes I nap whenever I can! But guilt follows me when I do-haven’t figured out how to escape the awkward feeling and just be OK with resting.)(Miss you guys-but we will see you soon I hope! And I am bringing my hat!!)
Come be my roomie again whenever you wish. But, this time, we’re blowing off studying in exchange for butterfly-watching. I’m so glad you nap when you can, Carolyn, even if the guilt still sneaks in. Maybe we just need to start reframing it as “deep economic recovery strategy?" 😄
Can’t wait to see you soon! -- and I've got a couple hats of my own I might bring along.
How strange it is to move from full-time mothering and full-time career to retirement and find that I no longer have the energy or endurance to do more than 2 or 3 outings in a day or only several hours of yard work. I've gradually come to accept that self care, including catnaps are not self indulgent but rather necessary for functioning. I awaken renewed and often inspired for journaling or painting or a call to a beloved friend.
The black swallowtail : I love seeing such a butterfly that takes longer to become than live! I haven’t seen one in Michigan for several years. Much you’ve given to think about. Thank you
I’m a ‘ never napper ‘ , so when I feel overwhelmed and need to rejuvenate myself , I tend to go outside into nature , my garden , looking up at the sky and clouds , and on down to the ground for all of the life that is not US . I often need breaks from people , and nature has always been my favorite sanctuary
Thank you so much Elizabeth , for your ability to to put to words the things that I cannot express
P.S. love those old Crocs of yours ! What a life they’ve lived!
The photo of the black swallowtail is surpassed only by the caption!
If I'd been able to wait just one more day (of course, I could not have known), I could have shared *this year's* pictures. One emerged Thursday and three more today. :) So good to see you here, as always.
I love to nap. I don't do it as often as I'd like. But when I'm fading, it's all I want. And I feel so much better afterwards. The swallowtail photo is so lovely. I may have to paint her.
"...it's all I want." Oh, yes, that!
I have more photos now, from this year's "crop." Three down, five to go. As if any do, this miracle never gets old.
Thank you for reading, Wendy.
Resting and staring into space, surely the best part of a good if busy day.
But it was the story of the butterflies that charmed me. They are so beautiful and to think the circle of life is so short for such exquisite creatures. Like the parti-coloured lizard - they all contribute to the most perfect natural escape. If we can just remain attentive enough. Sometimes I think our minds are like bees in a bottle or frogs in socks. We just need to settle...
I also love the way Barry comes back with the best responses. Every - single - time.
Barry is a miracle in his own right, and I'm smiling widely knowing you're getting to see that.
It's never occurred to me before now, but the skink and the black swallowtail are almost exactly the same colors - just arranged differently!
My new batch of "flutterbys" (a first to have so many at once) are bringing much joy. And Prue, your recent postcard!!! My goodness, it is a thing of beauty unto itself. Thank you.
Elizabeth, I could read a book of Barry-isms quite happily. So much gentle wisdom. And I also really must share an image of a stumpwork black swallowtail that a friend of mine embroidered. It’s so awesome!
I'm a seldom napper. And long ago I learned the importance of backing up, stopping, and taking a break. As for the "fatigue" you speak of -- everyone of my American friends (in America) speak of the political fatigue. They are consumed with politics. And I think -- what a drain on daily life that must be.
I think I'd put myself in the seldom napper category, too, Karen -- a step up from years of thinking I was a never napper. (Though I'm still not sure 20 minutes counts as a nap!)
Yes, I think most folks who are engaging with U.S. politics are drained as a result, and I'm 100% sure that's the point of it. But we are a determined bunch... 🔥
Life is but a dream. What exquisite yet entirely familiar images are conjured here! So enjoyable!
And I am behaving exactly like your mom but almost 40 years earlier I’m ready to go.
Exquisite and familiar -- music to my eyes!
You're not alone in having a hard time seeing the point of ::all this:: -- but I can tell you with all sincerity that your energy is gold, and I feel it coming through your words. Hugs of appreciation and empathy, Kathleen.
Ahhhh, 'They spend much longer becoming butterflies than they do being them.' is so poignant. An important reminder not to get so caught up in trying to get to some ultimate version of yourself - just be here now. Your life is now.
I am a napper. A big time napper. I am perpetually exhausted. I can sleep for 9 hours and take a 2 hour nap that afternoon and be ready to curl up in bed shortly after. Rest is hard for me. Or at least doing so without shame is. I come from a place that values hard work above all else. Working 12 hour days manual labour was not unheard of, and no one ever complained, they just kept going.
So I try to have a 7pm cut off. at 7 every night the day is done and I put down all the work, all the never ending to-do lists, and the shoulda dones, and I rest. I do only what I want - which is usually drinking tea reading with a cat on my lap in those last hours before bed.
Evelyn, your nighttime ritual sounds like one of the healthiest I've come across. Well done. One of my kids feels perpetually sleep deprived, and like you could sleep for hours in the middle of a day. You're both getting along as best you can in a society that doesn't take kindly to relaxation. There's real achievement in that, and I'm sure it's taken years to quiet the shame enough to let it happen.
Thanks for sharing this wonderful snippet of you! I'm glad you're here.